(First of all, it is two for the price of one day! Check the other blog from Friday below)
What is it with Nashville and everyone being pregnant? I am over it.
Just a tidbit of a conversation i had with one of my best friends, Emily, on the topic:
Emily: Mom just called me and said she was at the emergency room with Aaron. I knew it couldn’t be too severe because she wasn’t crying. Either he has a really bad urinary infection or it’s kidney stones. I feel so sorry for him and my dad because they have had kidney stones a lot and they are so painful.
Me: Eek. I would NEVER want that. I wonder if it is a similar pain to childbirth?
Emily: I don’t think so…Shana described it – it doesn’t come close. I think it’s the closest they come to experiencing the “tearing” pain (when they pass the stones) that we go through with birth.
Me: No lie, when you just said “tearing” my whole body cringed, ached, hurt, and convulsed just a little bit.
Emily: Yeah, probably too graphic of a word. Sorry about that.
Me: Pregnancy is all around me right now. I’m over it. Can we go back to talking about lip gloss again?
Emily: Sure…or how about the fact that I need a mani - pedi real bad. I think when Josh and I are really rich, this will be a twice a week necessity.
Me: Agreed.
Here is the list of my prego friends:
BB and Kristen- due in December
Cody and Tatum- due in December
Laura- due in February
Nick and Katherine- due in March
Mark and Kay- due in March
Max and Paula- due in March
Brooks and Lindsey- due in September
Ryan and Cate- due in February
Cousin Courtney- due in March
I know there are more...
Other people I know prego:
Heidi, Meredith, Alli, Alicia
People I know who just had a baby:
Mev, Whitney, Shana, Lindsey, Holly's sister
Anyway, to all of you baby makin' fools, CONGRATS!
Friday, August 8
Life, Love and the Pursuit of Happiness
An email conversation between one of my closest friends and I about the struggle with love, life and the constant letting go:
Me: Are you planning on going to Angela’s wedding? I think your answer to that is yes. I am not sure we are going to be able to...bummer...
Secondly, how are you? I heard…
Sarah: Yeah I'm definitely going. Of course. Like id miss this celebrity wedding.
As for how I'm doing:
Sh**ty.
As for how I'm doing:
Sh**ty.
Me: I’m sorry. I know it is hard. Can I do anything? Need anything? I’ve been praying for ya. Crap like this is never easy.
Sarah: Yeah, definitely not easy.
Sucks even worse to have to be at work letting my mind go a million miles a minute.
I have to choose to focus on the Lord all day or Ill wanna have a breakdown every 15 minutes.
Don’t get me wrong. The Lord has us right where he wants us. There’s SO much he’s doing on the inside of both of us.
There was so much pride in our lives and it ultimately made our lives together very miserable.
It sucks, because now that I see there was so much I did on my end that provoked him and there’s so much I could have prevented.
I know I can’t let my mind go there, but the Lord really is allowing me to look back and he’s highlighting all the rookie mistakes I made and its just disgusting honestly.
So it’s a good place to be. I’m just trying to lay it down everyday and doing my best to trust the Lord.
Its really hard though.
Sucks even worse to have to be at work letting my mind go a million miles a minute.
I have to choose to focus on the Lord all day or Ill wanna have a breakdown every 15 minutes.
Don’t get me wrong. The Lord has us right where he wants us. There’s SO much he’s doing on the inside of both of us.
There was so much pride in our lives and it ultimately made our lives together very miserable.
It sucks, because now that I see there was so much I did on my end that provoked him and there’s so much I could have prevented.
I know I can’t let my mind go there, but the Lord really is allowing me to look back and he’s highlighting all the rookie mistakes I made and its just disgusting honestly.
So it’s a good place to be. I’m just trying to lay it down everyday and doing my best to trust the Lord.
Its really hard though.
Me: Totally understand and I hate that you have to go thru it, but at the same time, it is part of that refining process He has us go thru. Daily I am reminded of More of Him and LESS, so much less, of me. When the bible talks about set your mind on things above, it is because our mind DOES NOT automatically go there, EVER. We have to CHOOSE where our mind goes, and it does take a conscience effort to put it on Him and not our circumstance. That is where abiding comes in. All day long, think of Him, think of where He is taking us, what He is doing, how He is in control, how there are mysteries hidden in Him that we have to seek HIM out to find…because when we seek, we find...even if we don’t find what we thought we would find, or end up where we thought we would end up. He doesn’t work like we think He does.
Let HIM rock your life right now. It will be worth it.
He is good Sarah, and though we go thru times like these and we wonder "why" in the midst and what is next, He IS in control and loves you unconditionally, despite your pride, your junk, your mess…and if you think about it, He loves you INspite of it.
Let HIM rock your life right now. It will be worth it.
He is good Sarah, and though we go thru times like these and we wonder "why" in the midst and what is next, He IS in control and loves you unconditionally, despite your pride, your junk, your mess…and if you think about it, He loves you INspite of it.
I feel like it should be one of those "enough said" moments. I am convicted by my own words. So it will be enough said. Leave your comments. Let's converse.
Monday, August 4
3 get-me-thinkings
"We are called to play the Good Samaritan on life's roadside...but one day we must come to see that the whole Jericho road must be transformed so that men and women will not be constantly beaten and robbed. True compassion is more than flinging a coin to a beggar. It comes to see that a system that produces beggars needs to be repaved. We are called to be the Good Samaritan, but after you lift so many people out of the ditch you start to ask, maybe the whole road to Jericho needs to be repaved." -Martin Luther King Jr.- A Time to Break the Silence
All around you, people will be tiptoeing through life, just to arrive at death safely. But dear children, do not tiptoe. Run, hop, skip, or dance, just don't tiptoe. -The Irresistible Revolution: Living as an Ordinary Radical By Shane Claiborne
"My deepest fear is not that I am inadequate. My deepest fear is that I am powerful beyond measure. It is my light, not my darkness, that most frightens me. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that others won't feel insecure. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others. - Nelson Mandela, Inaugural Speech 1994
Today is one of those days that I feel like a lot can be done, needs to be done and that we all can be apart of that change. Make today count.
All around you, people will be tiptoeing through life, just to arrive at death safely. But dear children, do not tiptoe. Run, hop, skip, or dance, just don't tiptoe. -The Irresistible Revolution: Living as an Ordinary Radical By Shane Claiborne
"My deepest fear is not that I am inadequate. My deepest fear is that I am powerful beyond measure. It is my light, not my darkness, that most frightens me. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that others won't feel insecure. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others. - Nelson Mandela, Inaugural Speech 1994
Today is one of those days that I feel like a lot can be done, needs to be done and that we all can be apart of that change. Make today count.
Wednesday, July 23
Hummus and Pita for me
I am a grazer...
I like chips and dip: salsa. guacamole. queso.
veggie trays. fruit plates. hummus and pita.
peanuts. crackers and spreads.
things on a toothpick.
I like anything bit size or that requires dipping.
I got to thinking about this and how i could fill myself up with this all day long, but that i am never fully satisfied. (you know where this is going don't you.)
I like chips and dip: salsa. guacamole. queso.
veggie trays. fruit plates. hummus and pita.
peanuts. crackers and spreads.
things on a toothpick.
I like anything bit size or that requires dipping.
I got to thinking about this and how i could fill myself up with this all day long, but that i am never fully satisfied. (you know where this is going don't you.)
With taking the risk of becoming predictable, why do we graze when there is so much more? Why am i just getting by but not digging in? Why don't i enjoy the fullness that is available?
I am slowly learning that there are many things in my life that i really need and want to work on, but when you do something for so long, it becomes a way of life, it becomes part of you, and you start to wonder and realize that you don't really know how to change them.
For me, it is two things that i am specifically talking about: it is a way of thinking. I am stuck right now with not taking a way that someone in my life speaks to me, too personally. I have to realize that they are talking to me the same way they are talking to another and another and it is born out of their insecurities. We are all bruised and battered, but there is no need to make someone lower to make yourself higher. I am trying to learn how not to respond defensively or feel like i have to say something to get my word in. This is really hard for me. The natural response when being attacked is to defend; to protect; and really to move on...or backwards.
Situation numero dos: Spiritually, right now i am just kind of getting by. I am in a slump. It is like i am stuck in a pit with no air and i am suffocating. I just have to crawl out. This is no one's fault but my own. I know what i need to do. I know where the fresh air is.
The truth is, the change has to come from within. To change thinking, YOU have to do it. To change actions, YOU have to do it. Does anyone know what i am talking about?
Thursday, July 17
Envy- the Enemy within
I pulled this from a friends blog. (Thanks Blaire!) It rocked me, and i thought it might rock you too. She is reading this book that i am about to pick up and dive into. Check this excerpt out from the book "Envy: The Enemy Within" by Bob Sorge.
it's a buzz kill, for sure:
"We resist pinning the label "envy" on the struggles of our soul because of the implications that word carries with it. If we own up to envy, we are giving admittance to some powerfully indicating weaknesses. We are tacitly admitting the following attitudes:
- I am ungrateful for what God has given me. His gifts are not enough for me; I also want what He's given another.
- My heart is motivated at a fundamental level by an element of self-interest, self-preservation and self-promotion. I am not able to fully celebrate my brother's successes because of underlying feelings of competition and ambition in my soul.
- My carnality is impeding the unity of the body of Christ--the unity that is central to the bride's preparation. Hence, part of me is hindering, instead of hastening, Christ's return."
Stop it. Those thoughts go so deep inside of me as I realize that i relate and/or reveal that i have thought those at one time or another...
Or daily.
How do we get past that? How do we take our once envy and turn that into passionate prayers and yearning desire for God to do whatever, whenever and however He pleases? How do we stop being so selfish and self-centered and let God dream His dreams through us?
Crap...that makes me hurt...
it's a buzz kill, for sure:
"We resist pinning the label "envy" on the struggles of our soul because of the implications that word carries with it. If we own up to envy, we are giving admittance to some powerfully indicating weaknesses. We are tacitly admitting the following attitudes:
- I am ungrateful for what God has given me. His gifts are not enough for me; I also want what He's given another.
- My heart is motivated at a fundamental level by an element of self-interest, self-preservation and self-promotion. I am not able to fully celebrate my brother's successes because of underlying feelings of competition and ambition in my soul.
- My carnality is impeding the unity of the body of Christ--the unity that is central to the bride's preparation. Hence, part of me is hindering, instead of hastening, Christ's return."
Stop it. Those thoughts go so deep inside of me as I realize that i relate and/or reveal that i have thought those at one time or another...
Or daily.
How do we get past that? How do we take our once envy and turn that into passionate prayers and yearning desire for God to do whatever, whenever and however He pleases? How do we stop being so selfish and self-centered and let God dream His dreams through us?
Crap...that makes me hurt...
Monday, July 14
my week in pictures
So we went camping for the 4th.
and this is what we woke up to on the 4th.
and here is my adorable hubby enjoying the morning view and weather
and this is what we woke up to on the 4th.
and here is my adorable hubby enjoying the morning view and weather
and here he is doing what he loves: hangglidding.
later my mother in law joined us
later we enjoyed a Fourth of July Parade
later my mother in law joined us
later we enjoyed a Fourth of July Parade
and here I am in Matt's glasses!
then we went to Arrington Vineyards for a picnic and live music.
My mom-in-law and I at Arrington Vineyards enjoying the music
then my sister in law and niece came in town and we hung out at Opryland.
Saturday we went to a friend's wedding in Memphis. It was so sweet! I got to see some of my favorite people in the world!
he is cute huh?
and here are my favorite people. I miss you guys!
It was a busy week.
Friday, July 11
legend of the sinking chair
As I type, I am sitting at my desk "working" (don't judge me for a messy desk. it is busy season!) and I am sinking. I know what you might be thinking: "I am sinking because I have so much work to do. My life is so busy that I cannot keep up." No, No. This is the literal sense of the word.
Every day it is the same thing: I come in and sit down with my knees to my chest, and the first thing I do is raise my chair to the normal sitting position. As the day goes on, I slowly sink lower and lower to where all of a sudden, my knees are at my chest again.
The process of raising and sinking continues.
"How did I get here?" I ask both to myself and my office-mate, Debby. Although I have accused Debby time and time again of coming to my desk to lower it when I leave, I have first hand evidence that proves otherwise. I sink. Daily. Minute-ly.
So what is it? What is the symbolism you might ask with my chair sinking? Could it be that my chair is sinking and that relates to the fact that in life at times we are sinking second to second and sometimes we don't notice? OR could it be that a chair is like the little things in our life? While some things are lowered at times and aren't as important, other things are raised?
Nope.
It is what it is.
A sinking chair.
And for now, on this Monday morning as I finish this posting from Friday I will resort to doing my work, hurrying to finish things for what is quickly becoming a fast paced week and I am sure I will continue to sink. Slowly and without notice until it is too late.
Thursday, July 10
Gitomer's steps to having your best year ever
OK, so after working at my new job for almost 3 months (i have survived! barely...), I just noticed this thing of "encouragement" that is taped to my desk. Here are my thoughts on this new found piece of support:
1. Define yourself.
consider it done. I know who I am and Whose I am. I am completely comfortable in my own skin and what I have to bring to the table.
2. Develop a sales mission statement.
YOU develop a sales mission statement...your head has a think candy shell on it...
3. Have a deep belief in the three critical areas of selling.
if i knew what those were, then i would pray about it...
4. Develop greater pride in accomplishment.
are you kidding? I love winning. I couldnt love to win any more. Who enjoys to lose? Plus i am too competitive for my own good. :)
5. Remember: You are what you eat.
Good come back!
6. Get rid of one time-waster.
Facebook???? yea right. Sometimes i do lunges past Debby's desk and I am not getting rid of that either.
7. Read a book every two months.
Does People magazine count? ha kidding. (some of you just said "wow" right there. i know you!)
8. Get your sales pipeline full.
trust me, i am on brain overload right now. there is no room for anything else unless i physically take something out.
9. Meet your monthly sales quota by the second week of the month.
HAHAHA not in this line of work buddy. I am in Non-Profit fundraising. See?
Jenna Cox
Campaign Manager
United Way of Williamson County
209 Gothic Court, Suite 107
Franklin, TN 37067
tel: 615-771-2312
fax: 615-771-6878
www.uwwc.org
GIVE. ADVOCATE. VOLUNTEER. LIVE UNITED™
that is my email signature. We don't meet quotas that quick.
10. Start branding yourself.
that would hurt. that is why i never got a tatoo.
11. Get up earlier.
No.
12. Begin capturing your thoughts and ideas in writing.
I do! All the time. And then i doodle around them to make them pretty.
13. Give one speech.
a day? ok. I have to give speeches every single day in my job. I should become a great speaker. At least I hope so.
14. Write one article your customers will read.
DONE! Here in lies my blog.
15. Make sales at breakfast.
to who? I don't talk to people during breakfast. Would you like for me to sell something to myself? What am i buying? Have i mentioned that i am not a morning person? B/c that is going to make it REALLY hard to sell something to myself. And what time IS breakfast b/c that determines a lot. We need to talk more about this.
16. Keep your customers loyal to you and your company.
I promise i will try Mr Gitomer. I am only one person.
17. Double your testimonials.
Ok.
18. Double your referrals.
Um...ok...
19. Record sales presentations.
with my thumb? No? Then can you buy me a recorder? (This reminds me of a Friend's line where Phoebe says "If you want to get email updates from me...then buy me a computer!")
20. Start every morning with attitude.
...TRUST ME....
20.5. Remember: You're not alone.
Thank you. I needed to remember that.
1. Define yourself.
consider it done. I know who I am and Whose I am. I am completely comfortable in my own skin and what I have to bring to the table.
2. Develop a sales mission statement.
YOU develop a sales mission statement...your head has a think candy shell on it...
3. Have a deep belief in the three critical areas of selling.
if i knew what those were, then i would pray about it...
4. Develop greater pride in accomplishment.
are you kidding? I love winning. I couldnt love to win any more. Who enjoys to lose? Plus i am too competitive for my own good. :)
5. Remember: You are what you eat.
Good come back!
6. Get rid of one time-waster.
Facebook???? yea right. Sometimes i do lunges past Debby's desk and I am not getting rid of that either.
7. Read a book every two months.
Does People magazine count? ha kidding. (some of you just said "wow" right there. i know you!)
8. Get your sales pipeline full.
trust me, i am on brain overload right now. there is no room for anything else unless i physically take something out.
9. Meet your monthly sales quota by the second week of the month.
HAHAHA not in this line of work buddy. I am in Non-Profit fundraising. See?
Jenna Cox
Campaign Manager
United Way of Williamson County
209 Gothic Court, Suite 107
Franklin, TN 37067
tel: 615-771-2312
fax: 615-771-6878
www.uwwc.org
GIVE. ADVOCATE. VOLUNTEER. LIVE UNITED™
that is my email signature. We don't meet quotas that quick.
10. Start branding yourself.
that would hurt. that is why i never got a tatoo.
11. Get up earlier.
No.
12. Begin capturing your thoughts and ideas in writing.
I do! All the time. And then i doodle around them to make them pretty.
13. Give one speech.
a day? ok. I have to give speeches every single day in my job. I should become a great speaker. At least I hope so.
14. Write one article your customers will read.
DONE! Here in lies my blog.
15. Make sales at breakfast.
to who? I don't talk to people during breakfast. Would you like for me to sell something to myself? What am i buying? Have i mentioned that i am not a morning person? B/c that is going to make it REALLY hard to sell something to myself. And what time IS breakfast b/c that determines a lot. We need to talk more about this.
16. Keep your customers loyal to you and your company.
I promise i will try Mr Gitomer. I am only one person.
17. Double your testimonials.
Ok.
18. Double your referrals.
Um...ok...
19. Record sales presentations.
with my thumb? No? Then can you buy me a recorder? (This reminds me of a Friend's line where Phoebe says "If you want to get email updates from me...then buy me a computer!")
20. Start every morning with attitude.
...TRUST ME....
20.5. Remember: You're not alone.
Thank you. I needed to remember that.
Wednesday, July 9
a few randoms
1) I am addicted to post-it notes. I use them for everything: reminders, doodling, decoration, encouragement, phone numbers, messages, adding, and gum-ridding... (I especially like the ones that come out of the dispenser. NIIIICE touch...
2) I have become REALLY forgetful. My brain is full i think.
3) I love taking pictures. I wish i could do it as a career.
4) I really would pack up my bags and move to Italy with my husband tomorrow if he said it was ok.
5) Ice Cream is my downfall.
6) i get many headaches. HATE hate it
7) I've always wanted to be more athletic and win at everything. not possible?
8) I love fixing things...taking things apart and putting them back together....and BUILDING things. I need a workshop
9) i always wonder if i missed my calling as a teacher. They have the best holidays. And although i dont really WANT to be a teacher, it could be awesome. But i love my job.
10) I change everyday on whether or not i am ready to have a kid. today i dont think i am ready, but yesterday I was ready. HA!
2) I have become REALLY forgetful. My brain is full i think.
3) I love taking pictures. I wish i could do it as a career.
4) I really would pack up my bags and move to Italy with my husband tomorrow if he said it was ok.
5) Ice Cream is my downfall.
6) i get many headaches. HATE hate it
7) I've always wanted to be more athletic and win at everything. not possible?
8) I love fixing things...taking things apart and putting them back together....and BUILDING things. I need a workshop
9) i always wonder if i missed my calling as a teacher. They have the best holidays. And although i dont really WANT to be a teacher, it could be awesome. But i love my job.
10) I change everyday on whether or not i am ready to have a kid. today i dont think i am ready, but yesterday I was ready. HA!
Wednesday, July 2
...and a big tub of ice cream it will be.
do you remember that episode of FRIENDS where Monica and Rachel are talking to Chandler about Janice and their break up? Here is a taste:
Rachel: Okay, no, wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute. Maybe it's not so bad. How did you leave it?
Chandler: She said she'd call me.
Rachel and Monica: Oh.
Chandler: Oh God.
Monica: Welcome to our side of the tunnel.
Chandler: This ice cream tastes like crap by the way.
Rachel: Yeah, well that's that low-cal, non-dairy, soy milk junk. We sort of... we save the real stuff for the truly terminal cases.
Monica: You know, when you start getting screwed over all the time, you gotta switch to low-fat.
well i am bummed. MAJORLY bummed. In fact, it feels like a break-up. So much so, that i think i need some ice cream (non-fat of course. TCBY anyone?)
We had our sweet little hearts set on purchasing our first home, we found one we liked with tons of potential and in the perfect area, our lease is ending in less than 30 days, and today we find out it won't happen, thru no matters of our own. There is a long list of whys that i wont bore you with, but all i will say is that I'm at the end-of-the-cone of disappointment. I am suffering a brain freeze from what i expected to happen.
It makes me think, do our expectations have anything to do with our outcomes? Did i "eat my least favorite flavor on purpose" with what i THOUGHT would happen, and write it off as "this is what always happens, so why wouldn't it this time?" Why am I not more of an optimist? Why would i EXPECT this to happen?
A song on the radio has me thinking today: "There is hope when our faith runs out. I'm in better hands now." Why don't we live like this more? Why do i take this as a personal hit and not just it is what it is and it just isn't the right time?
"I'm in better Hands now." Recite that to yourself when you feel you are loosing your nerve (and i am!). "I'm in better Hands now" means that i had to realize I shouldn't have been in control in the first place. "I'm in better Hands now" means protection and provision. "I'm in better Hands now" means that i AM in better hands...now.
Rachel: Okay, no, wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute. Maybe it's not so bad. How did you leave it?
Chandler: She said she'd call me.
Rachel and Monica: Oh.
Chandler: Oh God.
Monica: Welcome to our side of the tunnel.
Chandler: This ice cream tastes like crap by the way.
Rachel: Yeah, well that's that low-cal, non-dairy, soy milk junk. We sort of... we save the real stuff for the truly terminal cases.
Monica: You know, when you start getting screwed over all the time, you gotta switch to low-fat.
well i am bummed. MAJORLY bummed. In fact, it feels like a break-up. So much so, that i think i need some ice cream (non-fat of course. TCBY anyone?)
We had our sweet little hearts set on purchasing our first home, we found one we liked with tons of potential and in the perfect area, our lease is ending in less than 30 days, and today we find out it won't happen, thru no matters of our own. There is a long list of whys that i wont bore you with, but all i will say is that I'm at the end-of-the-cone of disappointment. I am suffering a brain freeze from what i expected to happen.
It makes me think, do our expectations have anything to do with our outcomes? Did i "eat my least favorite flavor on purpose" with what i THOUGHT would happen, and write it off as "this is what always happens, so why wouldn't it this time?" Why am I not more of an optimist? Why would i EXPECT this to happen?
A song on the radio has me thinking today: "There is hope when our faith runs out. I'm in better hands now." Why don't we live like this more? Why do i take this as a personal hit and not just it is what it is and it just isn't the right time?
"I'm in better Hands now." Recite that to yourself when you feel you are loosing your nerve (and i am!). "I'm in better Hands now" means that i had to realize I shouldn't have been in control in the first place. "I'm in better Hands now" means protection and provision. "I'm in better Hands now" means that i AM in better hands...now.
Friday, June 27
are you following me?
(a tribute to my best friend)
This morning I was thinking back on one of my favorite memories post college. After I was done with Baylor, I decided that a move to Dallas was for me. I moved to a low profile area of Dallas (Go big DUNCANVILLE! ha) b/c that was what I could afford, but just a few short minutes from my very best friend in the world. I moved into my first place by myself, and within a few months I landed a job as a Personal Assistant and Nanny for a Highland Park family.
Believe it or not, I was working a HIGH stress job. As much as I enjoyed the freedom of my job and the money I was making, I ALWAYS had stories, always had a complaint, always had a vent, always had a laugh with my friends Then we started something to this day, was one of my favorite things. My best friend said "I've got the best show in the world. Just watch one episode and you will be hooked." A group of almost 10 of us on any given occasion would get together and watch 'Alias', starting with season 1. We would watch up to 5 episodes a night. This show was so addictive to us and not to mention, we would work our whole night around this. We would make our plans starting in the morning about what we wanted to eat for dinner, where we were going to watch it and how many we were going to try to "get in." I didn't end up caring that I would get home past midnight and that I had to work early the next morning. We just HAD to finish all seasons before the next season started in the fall.
So we watched all night long and then i would drive home. I remember this feeling like it was yesterday. I would walk quickly to my car, get in and lock my doors. I would scurry out of the driveway and drive like mad the 5 minutes it took to get home. The entire ride home, every car that i saw, was following me. Someone was watching me. I could just feel it. SOMEONE was out to get me. I was sure there was some secret mission I would get pulled into. I prayed at the 3 stop lights that no one would get me and that i didn't have to use my awesome ninja skills that i only THOUGHT i had. Hey, if Sydney Bristow can kick but, so can I. And she never had a scar or scratch on her!
Then I would pull into my apartment complex, drive to the very back where I lived, run out of my car barely taking everything in that i needed, opening the door and slamming it behind me, the whole time watching my back at every move. Click. Click. Door locked. Shew! Another night of safety so I didn't have to kick the spy's sneaky butts.
As I think back on something so quirky, it makes me miss Brittany so much. She's dealt with my craziness, quirkiness, flightiness, stupid jokes, creativity, ideas, travels, moves, changes, etc. Although we don't get to see each other that often these days, me living in Nashville and her in Conway, she means the world to me.
Britt, thanks for making me feel like people are always following me.
It means the world..... (haha!) Love ya.
Believe it or not, I was working a HIGH stress job. As much as I enjoyed the freedom of my job and the money I was making, I ALWAYS had stories, always had a complaint, always had a vent, always had a laugh with my friends Then we started something to this day, was one of my favorite things. My best friend said "I've got the best show in the world. Just watch one episode and you will be hooked." A group of almost 10 of us on any given occasion would get together and watch 'Alias', starting with season 1. We would watch up to 5 episodes a night. This show was so addictive to us and not to mention, we would work our whole night around this. We would make our plans starting in the morning about what we wanted to eat for dinner, where we were going to watch it and how many we were going to try to "get in." I didn't end up caring that I would get home past midnight and that I had to work early the next morning. We just HAD to finish all seasons before the next season started in the fall.
So we watched all night long and then i would drive home. I remember this feeling like it was yesterday. I would walk quickly to my car, get in and lock my doors. I would scurry out of the driveway and drive like mad the 5 minutes it took to get home. The entire ride home, every car that i saw, was following me. Someone was watching me. I could just feel it. SOMEONE was out to get me. I was sure there was some secret mission I would get pulled into. I prayed at the 3 stop lights that no one would get me and that i didn't have to use my awesome ninja skills that i only THOUGHT i had. Hey, if Sydney Bristow can kick but, so can I. And she never had a scar or scratch on her!
Then I would pull into my apartment complex, drive to the very back where I lived, run out of my car barely taking everything in that i needed, opening the door and slamming it behind me, the whole time watching my back at every move. Click. Click. Door locked. Shew! Another night of safety so I didn't have to kick the spy's sneaky butts.
As I think back on something so quirky, it makes me miss Brittany so much. She's dealt with my craziness, quirkiness, flightiness, stupid jokes, creativity, ideas, travels, moves, changes, etc. Although we don't get to see each other that often these days, me living in Nashville and her in Conway, she means the world to me.
Britt, thanks for making me feel like people are always following me.
It means the world..... (haha!) Love ya.
Wednesday, June 25
House Hunting
So, we are house hunting
right now. We found one that we really like that is in a great area here in Franklin, we are just trying to figure our financial junk out. Here is my realization:
right now. We found one that we really like that is in a great area here in Franklin, we are just trying to figure our financial junk out. Here is my realization: I know very little about all of this. Check out this email from a friend of ours that is helping us with CLUES on what to do (maybe it will help you!):
You want her to know there are no contingenies on your end BUT normal financing contingencies you must go through when borrowing for a house loan. Another contingency you MUST have is an Appraisal contingency! Your lender will order an appraisal for the house and it must appraisal for the contract price or higher NOT lower! If its comes in lower then it back to the negotiating table or you have the right as buyers to withdraw your offer and ALL earnest monies are returned to you!!! Then you have an Inspection Contingency! You have the right as a buyer to have a licensed inspector, ( I have a great Christian and knowledgable man I use). Title Deed to be in your legal married names.Buyers pay for their closings costs and sellers pay for their closing costs. All taxes and home owners associat on dues if applicable are to be pre rated and paid by the seller! Seller to pay and pay for a "clear" termite letter" for the closing as well! If seller has any termite infestation then seller to pay costs for termite treatment and able a clear termite letter after the treatment. I know there are more things to a contract. You will have to let me think and maybe go over more with you once you make the Offer in writing to Purchase! Remember just because you are writing up an Offer to Purchase does NOT mean you have to BUY or close as ong as you have several contingenies to PROTECT yourselves thru the process. Its takes about 30 days to close a loan so dont put anything sooner than 30-40 days to close, ok honey! If everything gets done on your loan, appraisals and inspections sooner then you move the date up if you all are in agreement on that? Buyers normally have 7-10 working days to get this done at your cost! Anywhere from $250-$360 for a good home inspection, fyi. You/buyers ask for the seller to pay for like $500- $1000 in repairs after you receive the inspection report back. You type up a list of repairs you want to seller to pay to have done and you want it done by a licensed "what ever" eletrician, contractor, plumber, etc? Whatever the repairs calls for! NOTHING cosmetic applies, fyi. Like stains on carpets, etc?
I need to take a nap. Reading that made me tired and not want to do anything. Is it 4:30 yet? I had NO idea so much went into this. But we are praying and hoping that it all works out. We are nearing the end of our lease at the end of July and getting SUPER nervous! Could you say a prayer for us? :) (then we will need a prayer for us doing renovations!) thanks!
Wednesday, June 18
WOW...ok i am back
Ok, so my bad for not updating. But I will be better, starting now... :)
Ok quick recap since March:
i got: a new job!!! I am Campaign Manager at The United Way of Williamson County.
i ran: my 1/2 marathon, and I am hooked!!!
i am: super stoked that it is SUMMER. and I am hungry...
i think: about my future children and what they will be like. What traits of Matt will they have?
What of me?
i forget: to update this blog...oops.
i know: how much i like to shop with Emily and end with coffee and magazines. She's the best!
i want: a puppy! Golden Retreiver please!
i have: the best husband a girl could ever ask for.
i wish: that I could be in Italy right now...
i hate: that i dont paint and write more when it makes me super happy.
i miss: my best friends in the whole world. (You know who you are!)
i fear: hurting the people I love most in this world.
i feel: hurt by people...
i hear: my co-worker pecking at her computer. Atta girl Debbi!
i smell: my lunch coming in the door.
i crave: ice cream. Any kind, any day, any hour, any time of year.
i search: for God's direction for my life.
i wonder: when we will have the freedom to pick up and travel to our heart's content.
i regret: being a punk to my mom when i was a teenager.
i love: Matthew Ryan Cox
i ache: in my back. I need a better mattress! (Sarah, remember, i slept so good that it hurts?
Ahh the good ole days!)
i care: waaay to much. I want to give it all away for people who need it. Extreme Home
Makeover? Makes me cry everytime!
i always: say I love you when i walk out the front door.
i am not: the best cook. But i try!
i believe: that God is Love.
i dance: way to much and am awesome...HA!
i sing: all the time to Jesus.
i don’t always: stay awake for the end of movies.
i fight: when I feel insecure.
i write: too little.
i win: everyday...
i lose: everyday...
i never: remember everything.
i turned: 25 in February! SCARY!!!!
i confuse: spelling. Is it receive or recieve? :)
i listen: to music...all day
i can usually be found: if you call me.
i am scared: of spiders...wolf spiders that i find in my apartment to be exact. EEK!!!!
i need: Jesus.
i am happy about: going to VEGAS in August!!!!
Ok quick recap since March:
i got: a new job!!! I am Campaign Manager at The United Way of Williamson County.
i ran: my 1/2 marathon, and I am hooked!!!
i am: super stoked that it is SUMMER. and I am hungry...
i think: about my future children and what they will be like. What traits of Matt will they have?
What of me?
i forget: to update this blog...oops.
i know: how much i like to shop with Emily and end with coffee and magazines. She's the best!
i want: a puppy! Golden Retreiver please!
i have: the best husband a girl could ever ask for.
i wish: that I could be in Italy right now...
i hate: that i dont paint and write more when it makes me super happy.
i miss: my best friends in the whole world. (You know who you are!)
i fear: hurting the people I love most in this world.
i feel: hurt by people...
i hear: my co-worker pecking at her computer. Atta girl Debbi!
i smell: my lunch coming in the door.
i crave: ice cream. Any kind, any day, any hour, any time of year.
i search: for God's direction for my life.
i wonder: when we will have the freedom to pick up and travel to our heart's content.
i regret: being a punk to my mom when i was a teenager.
i love: Matthew Ryan Cox
i ache: in my back. I need a better mattress! (Sarah, remember, i slept so good that it hurts?
Ahh the good ole days!)
i care: waaay to much. I want to give it all away for people who need it. Extreme Home
Makeover? Makes me cry everytime!
i always: say I love you when i walk out the front door.
i am not: the best cook. But i try!
i believe: that God is Love.
i dance: way to much and am awesome...HA!
i sing: all the time to Jesus.
i don’t always: stay awake for the end of movies.
i fight: when I feel insecure.
i write: too little.
i win: everyday...
i lose: everyday...
i never: remember everything.
i turned: 25 in February! SCARY!!!!
i confuse: spelling. Is it receive or recieve? :)
i listen: to music...all day
i can usually be found: if you call me.
i am scared: of spiders...wolf spiders that i find in my apartment to be exact. EEK!!!!
i need: Jesus.
i am happy about: going to VEGAS in August!!!!
Tuesday, March 11
BACK OFF: This is my challenge
How do you encourage someone to rise to the challenge? How do you say to someone "You are a snob and need to let people in but instead of doing that you are pushing everyone away, judging others, and no one will WANT to stick around if you keep doing that? And all you are doing now is pushing me away!"
Not OK?
Yea, I figured.
I am really perplexed today. I had a difficult conversation with a friend of mine this past week that I have not been able to shake. Did I say what I wanted to say? Did it come across correctly? Has this forever shaken our relationship?
No one really wants to hear the hard things.
But here is where I am really torn:
More than myself or what I said or how I came across, I am hurting for this person because of their cowering from the challenge. From one simple conversation about "stepping out of their comfort zone" they have chosen to stop and quit.
Done. Finito. STOP. NO mas.
The towel has been thrown in.
Making yourself available and KNOWN is always a risk that you have to take. "What if they reject me?" "What if I lose my trust in them?" What if they lose their trust in me?" "What if they don't like what I have to give?" There is always a fear in trust. Accountability is fearing. It is scary. "This person will know it all."
What if we cowered down from all the things that God has called us to? And do we realize the ripple effects of what each decision another person makes has on the next person? What in my life is comparable to this situation where all I do when presented with a challenge...is quit... Where would I be? What would I be doing? Where would i be going? or not going?
What have I missed...
Lord, help me listen to your Voice so that I can hold fast to you. I don't want to miss it.
I don't want to miss you.
Not OK?
Yea, I figured.
I am really perplexed today. I had a difficult conversation with a friend of mine this past week that I have not been able to shake. Did I say what I wanted to say? Did it come across correctly? Has this forever shaken our relationship?
No one really wants to hear the hard things.
But here is where I am really torn:
More than myself or what I said or how I came across, I am hurting for this person because of their cowering from the challenge. From one simple conversation about "stepping out of their comfort zone" they have chosen to stop and quit.
Done. Finito. STOP. NO mas.
The towel has been thrown in.
Making yourself available and KNOWN is always a risk that you have to take. "What if they reject me?" "What if I lose my trust in them?" What if they lose their trust in me?" "What if they don't like what I have to give?" There is always a fear in trust. Accountability is fearing. It is scary. "This person will know it all."
What if we cowered down from all the things that God has called us to? And do we realize the ripple effects of what each decision another person makes has on the next person? What in my life is comparable to this situation where all I do when presented with a challenge...is quit... Where would I be? What would I be doing? Where would i be going? or not going?
What have I missed...
Lord, help me listen to your Voice so that I can hold fast to you. I don't want to miss it.
I don't want to miss you.
Monday, March 3
Sometimes I forget to update:
If something inside you is real, we will probably find it interesting, and it will probably be universal. So you must risk placing real emotion at the center of your work. Write straight into the emotional center of things. Write toward vulnerability. Don’t worry about appearing sentimental. Worry about being unavailable; worry about being absent or fraudulent. Risk being unliked. Tell the truth as you understand it. If you’re a writer you have a moral obligation to do this. And it is a revolutionary act - - truth is always subversive.
Anne Lamott in Bird By Bird
Friday, January 11
So, I am famous...as if you didnt know.
Go check out my friend Hannah's photography page and look at how famous my hubby and I are:
and while you are at it, go look at how amazing my wedding photographer is and see how cool my beach wedding was:
http://www.truerichesphotography.com
or
http://www.photostockplus.com/home.php?tmpl=42&user_id=25181&event=102236
Peace.
and while you are at it, go look at how amazing my wedding photographer is and see how cool my beach wedding was:
http://www.truerichesphotography.com
or
http://www.photostockplus.com/home.php?tmpl=42&user_id=25181&event=102236
Peace.
Sunday, January 6
Have I lost my mind?
Why, hello there. I am running a half marathon. Have i lost it? Hmmm, not sure yet. I will keep you updated.
Oh, and HAVE I LOST IT?!
Thursday, January 3
One Day...
I had a conversation with a friend today about doing things we would love to do. It went something like this:
It makes me wonder, why do we settle? Why do we just take what we can get when there is more to life? Why do we settle for good, when there is BEST?
It is now 2008 and I am determined this year more than ever to really go for the things I want to do. God has placed in me a passion to move. to go. to see. to do. to love more. love what I DO more. to push myself to the limits. stopping is scary. waiting is...well.. it is waiting...know what i mean? Does that scare you like it does me?
"one day." one day she says.
What if we allow ourselves to never let "one day" happen because it is always in the too distant future? we are waiting for more money. waiting for mr. (or mrs.) right. waiting to be accepted. waiting to be in better shape. waiting to get our life in order. waiting to get that interview for a job we don't really want. waiting waiting waiting...
thing I want to do THIS YEAR:
1. go on a Cruise
2. run a half marathon (I AM IN APRIL!)
3. sell some paintings
4. take some photography and painting classes
5. host a dinner party
6. start a business
7. make new friends
8. finish some of the many books I have started.
9. ride in a hot air balloon.
10. buy land to begin my dream
the list continues. (i will keep updating this list.)
In closing, i want you to read something found from another blog. May it inspire you as it does me. May it CONFIRM in you what it confirmed in me:
sunshinesteph25 (11:35:51 AM): when i get married, i would love to be able to just work part time & focus on those thing [that i really want to do].
ME (AOL) (11:36:00 AM): for sure
sunshinesteph25 (11:36:23 AM): again...one day...it will happen!
ME (AOL) (11:39:59 AM): i wish life wasn't about waiting to do the things you really wanted to do
ME (AOL) (11:40:25 AM): if every person really WENT after their dreams, what do you think this world would be like?
It makes me wonder, why do we settle? Why do we just take what we can get when there is more to life? Why do we settle for good, when there is BEST?
It is now 2008 and I am determined this year more than ever to really go for the things I want to do. God has placed in me a passion to move. to go. to see. to do. to love more. love what I DO more. to push myself to the limits. stopping is scary. waiting is...well.. it is waiting...know what i mean? Does that scare you like it does me?
"one day." one day she says.
What if we allow ourselves to never let "one day" happen because it is always in the too distant future? we are waiting for more money. waiting for mr. (or mrs.) right. waiting to be accepted. waiting to be in better shape. waiting to get our life in order. waiting to get that interview for a job we don't really want. waiting waiting waiting...
thing I want to do THIS YEAR:
1. go on a Cruise
2. run a half marathon (I AM IN APRIL!)
3. sell some paintings
4. take some photography and painting classes
5. host a dinner party
6. start a business
7. make new friends
8. finish some of the many books I have started.
9. ride in a hot air balloon.
10. buy land to begin my dream
the list continues. (i will keep updating this list.)
In closing, i want you to read something found from another blog. May it inspire you as it does me. May it CONFIRM in you what it confirmed in me:
Stop doing what everybody else is doing.
Stop doing what you’ve always done.
Most human beings deeply desire to be used by God in unique and extraordinary ways.
Most human beings talk about these desires.
And most make resolutions about how they’ll change their lives in order to see these desires fulfilled.
But few do.
Trust God with a unique and extraordinary faith this year.
Do the things that few do.
12 spies took inventory of the Promised Land.
All of them desired to go in.
Only 2 were willing to fight for it.
Only 2.
See what I’m saying?
Many desire…
Few do.
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